It’s that time again. We who review all the TV commercials have been idle. The last time I remember eying the good, the bad, and the ugly was just after the Super Bowl. A lot has happened since then, mostly obnoxious.

There’s one commercial I just can’t watch. The minute I hear the first sound I push the mute button, which is getting pretty thin.

It’s that group of men and women, sitting around a conference table of some sort, who talk in little bitty children’s voices extolling the virtues of Haribo candies. Because of them, I would never buy that brand. They make me nauseous.

Equally obnoxious are the “ugly houses” people who give a slanted dinner table as an example of an “ugly house.”

The poor man says, “Please pass the pudding.”

First and foremost, the stuff in the bowl isn’t pudding, but gelatin.

Second and equally important, who would sell their house to a company that advertises “ugly” houses. I don’t think anybody thinks his beloved house is ugly. It’s a complete oxymoron.

There’s another “ugly house” commercial featuring a car with words painted on it. I don’t get it.

Something else I don’t get is the woman who has overcome a migraine headache and is able to play a game — pirates and princess — with her daughter. Did you ever have a mother who played a pretend game with you? Not me.

We did lots of pretend. In fact, we used a special made up word, “plak” to initiate the activity.

As in “plak we are going up in an airplane.”

Plak means “play like.” Remember that?

We could plak just about anything, but not with our mothers.

What do you do when you see a Farmers Insurance commercial in which the company has solved yet another strange claim? What I do is sing the “bum de bum bum, bum bum bum” song at the end.

In fact, lots of commercials lead me into song, such as “Help” by The Beatles, which goes on to advertise Google. I end up singing it all day long. They call that an “ear worm,” which is a disgusting description.

That one I like, and another entertaining one is full of beautiful art and ends with the quote “We need art just like we need water.” I have misplaced its sponsor.

Another pretty one is the “things are better in threes.” I don’t mind watching all that lovely scenery.

What do you think about the turkey in quitting slow turkey, instead of cold turkey? I think he’s horrible looking, but he’s serving a good cause, so I applaud his creator.

Then there’s the guy who has just “repaired” the carnival ride the mom and child are fixing to enjoy. That’s just plain scary, a symbol of all tings thrown together haphazardly.

Finally, one more animal to enjoy. The dog who keeps bringing home odd presents for his lady. We all wonder where he got the bikini top.

Try out these few, and remember, you too have not only a mute button, but a fast forward. Enjoy.

Cathy Gillentine is a Daily News columnist. She may be reached at cathy.gillentine@comcast.net.

(7) comments

Carlos Ponce

There's a lot of commercials out there apparently not aimed at my demographics. I find them annoying. That's why I DVR a lot of programs, view them when I have time and fast forward through those obnoxious commercials.

Mark Stevens

Commercials aren't to think....Commercials are to ...BUY. BUY BUY... and the 5th Ave clowns who dream these things up don't care if they annoy ....the just want us to remember the product name and subliminally reach for it on the shelf, or order it online...or whatever.
Mark W. Stevens

Bailey Jones

I've reached the age where I have all I need and rarely buy stuff. I enjoy commercials by watching the background actors and wondering how much they make and if they worry whether they'll ever get a real acting job. And I like reading the fine print on medical commercials and comparing side effects caused by the medication to side effects that just "have happened". But it could be worse - and it will be. 2020 is just around the corner.

Mike Trube

I can't stand fake animals trying to direct our lives. The owl with glasses? Isn't that an oxymoron? Orange paper rabbits saving for your retirement, and the goose trying to be helpful when you are injured. It iratates me to see a commercial that you aren't able in the beginning to tell what they are advertising. My dad would never eat a Twix bar just because he hated the ad, and they have only gotten dumber. I call the time for 4-7 minutes of ads, my commercial cleaning time. But I too tape all my favorite shows so I'm able to fast forward through them. I've discovered for every hour long show, there's 15 minutes(or more) of commercials. Oh, another thing. I do not buy anything just because a famous person is in the ad. In the ads of old, and thinking back, how funny it is now to see a doctor recommending a certain brand of cigarettes. The quick weight loss ads. That's the worse thing you can do. It doesn't stay off. Best to do it slowly. One last thing. I do miss the commercial with the Native American sad to see litter. Saying, take only what you need, leave the rest as you found it. We need more like that.

Connie

Bailey Jones

Iron Eyes Cody - He initially didn't want to do the commercial because, he said, ''Indians don't cry.'' Lady Bird Johnson persuaded him to do it. The tear was glycerin. And Iron Eyes Cody, perhaps our most recognizable Indian actor, was an Italian American, born as Espera Oscar de Corti. Such is the ad world.

Jose' Boix

Then there are the commercials that leave me without really knowing what they were advertising...then the ones that seemingly are shown almost back-to-back...I guess there are all keen marketing strategies!

Lyra Mitchell

Our family’s favorite commercial is Subaru. A couple is traveling the Pacific trail and encounter a blind man to show them the way. He eventually tells them, “If you listen closely, you hear the whales.”

This is the cue for my son to insert fart noises.

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